"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
