Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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