They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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