just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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