Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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