btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
