i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Why is your signature on my underwear?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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