Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
