There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
