operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Success! We fucked roommates!
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
