apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
