I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
