therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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