Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I have aggressive nipples.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
