Midget sex pt 2 tonight
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
