dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
