Soap is not a condiment
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
