you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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