I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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