I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I am full of burrito and curiosity
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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