I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Shame - the story of my life.
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