I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
