you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize