I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
