If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize