and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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