it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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