I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
