Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
