You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I have peed in a lot of sinks
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
