I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
