So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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