Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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