I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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