i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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