There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
