doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
