Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
