I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize