What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize