It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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