I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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