Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
