you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
