pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
