Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
