Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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