You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
