okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
