I looked at my own cervix.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize