Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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